Me and Amy were at Highline Park on like 14th Street when we were doing our mini-photoshoot thing and thought this was sort of a nice picture. What ya'll think?
Ok, I have no idea why but me and Addison were talking and then some how the subject of what we wanted and expected High School to be like came up. So we went to into this really deep conversation, and I said some stuff that even I was even surprised to here me say.
The conversation started out as him talking about life "friend groups" forming and how Yulia had changed and everything, then I started too tell him out High School was really not what I expected it to be honestly. As some of you might know I used to go to private school at LREI up on Houston and Bleeker and it's small classrooms like basically 15 kids or less in each class, so I was basically friends with everyone in the school. Last year, it was time to choose High School after I got my test results back and I think I remember getting into Millennium, Eleanor Roosevelt (I think I spelled that wrong), and two other ones I forget. I chose Millennium even though I wanted Beacon because it seemed like a cool place.
Flashforward to the new school year, I'm excited ready to make new friends and everything, whatever, whatever. And then I learn that half of the people that are going to this school already know each other (mostly everyone was from 89). So like automatically that just makes it awkward for me... then I met Pola. The first person I knew, I remember it. She was from a different school too so we started talking and got to know her better and eventually, she started making friends and wanted to introduce to this dude Nathan. Nathan was a cool guy. But, it was weird cause the friendship between me and her was short-lived cause we were in different sections.
So I was once again somewhat alone and finally after like I week or so I started making more friends in 9F (my section), and it was all good. After awhile though I started to question why (and how) I wasn't friends with a lot of people outside of my section and everything I thought of kept leading to the same thought.
Everyone knew each other cause of 89. And since I was isolated in that small school I felt like (I know this is cliche or whatever) a needle in a haystack, lol. Honestly. Then I started thinking about like the whole High School experience in general and how to get to parties, etc., etc. So pretty much I realised I needed to be more outgoing. That doesn't mean I'm not going to be me but, I have to not be so shy or whatever it is anymore that's holding me back from talking to certain people.
So basically, the true reason I have been rambling this whole time is to say, it never hurts to be yourself, you really honestly might regret not being friendly and saying "hi" to someone you see everyday or, maybe being shy in general. But, do keep one thing in mind, what ever you are lacking is always attainable.
"Fear is like an illusion of millions of cracks in a window you can't look through, the thing is... it's really actually clear."
